FATHERHOOD!
5:07 PM
So I wrote this blog post awhile back and forgot to post it. It's a look into my thoughts and feelings about my wife's pregnancy and my feelings about becoming a father. As some of you may know, my son entered the world a couple weeks early. He was born on May 27th at 3:53am. He was a healthy 7lbs 13 ounce and almost 19 inches long. I never imagined that that moment of seeing my son born would be so emotional and life changing. I wanted to still post this because I thought it said a lot about where my head was at. (I'll tell the story about his birth in another post.)
As a man, I've always dreamed of having a son and teaching him how to become a great human being number one and number two teaching him to play and enjoy sports. (Hopefully Basketball lol) I've had this version in my head for as long as I can remember. But to actually get the news that my wife is pregnant and we are going to have a boy was a feeling that I can't explain. I was so pumped to know that I would get the opportunity to make the visions that I had come true.
I must say this right now. I give women a ton of credit for carrying our children for 9 months. Watching my wife's body change during this pregnancy has been crazy. I mean there's a little human growing inside of them. The thought blows my mind. As a man I know for a fact that I wouldn't be able to hack it. Their bodies aren't theirs for 9 months!!! I often feel helpless, seeing my wife so tired, in discomfort, struggling to do basic task like trying to put on shoes hurts me. I try to be as helpful as I can so that she doesn't have to do much. I mean she is carrying my little guy in there.
I have to admit something to you guys. As the due date gets closers with each passing day my nerves get worse and anxiety builds. Thoughts like "Am I going to be a good dad?" "Am I going to get my wife to the hospital fast enough?" "Will I be able to provide family with all that they need?" "Am I going to be able to balance being a parent and being my own boss?" But instead of stressing I am going to look for guidance from my Heavenly Father Jesus Christ. I know he got me and my family and he will give us everything that we need.
Evidence of him providing for us was on display during our baby shower. My wife and I were so overwhelmed by all of the people that showed up barring gifts and cards and love for us and the baby. It was one thing to see the gift table be consumed by beautiful gift bags and beautifully wrapped gifts, but to actually go through each and every gift to see what we had was mind blowing. I will just say that our son won't need anything for a while. I mean we received awesome clothes, gift cards and custom items from people that truly love us. And I am forever grateful to all of my family friends that contributed to making sure my son was taken care of. I love each and everyone of you guys.
Our son's due date is June 15th and I can't wait to meet him. From the looks of my wife's belly, this little dudes gonna be an active one like I was when I was a kid. I wanna know how he's going to be, I wanna know what sport he wants to play, what's gonna be his favorite things, will he be the kid that I always imagined? All I know is that I'm excited and nervous about this next chapter in my life. I do know it's gonna be awesome and I'm gonna do whatever is needed so that my wife and son are provided for. It's time to put all the fatherly qualities that I learned from my father to use. Shout out to my father for being an awesome dad and doing whatever he had to do to provide and be there for my sister and I. I will take all that you did and apply it to my parenting skills. You sacrificed so much of your own so that we had the best. That's what I plan to do. My life is not my own once my son enters the world. Wait who am I kidding my life hasn't been my own since I said "I Do"! Lol.
I am truly blessed to have a strong beautiful wife by my side that will be my parenting partner. I have two awesome parents and a awesome mother in law and aunts that will help us along the way. And all of our awesome friends and family and extended families. We are so freaking blessed. As a child I never imagined that my wife and I would be so blessed with such a ridiculously amazing support system. I have no one but the Lord to thank for this.
When my son is born you guys will know. I hope to add my parenting adventures to this blog in the near future.
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